


Matsuoka Rin's Samezuka Diary

by epithalamium



Category: Free!
Genre: Bridget Jones's Diary Samezuka Style!, Crack, I'm Sorry, M/M, i have no excuses for this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-17
Updated: 2013-12-17
Packaged: 2018-01-04 23:04:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1086728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/epithalamium/pseuds/epithalamium
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Day 1, 2540 cal, 10 st 6 lb<br/>Moved in my new dorm today. Place a bit bigger than my old room in Australia, but apparently I have to share it with another person. First year. Name of Nitori Aiichirou. He was already here when I got back with my stuff, and the first thing he said—after introducing himself—was, ‘Do you prefer top or bottom?’</p>
            </blockquote>





	Matsuoka Rin's Samezuka Diary

**Author's Note:**

> Regrets, there are many. /o\

** Rin’s Samezuka Diary **

Day 1, 2540 cal, 10 st 6 lb  


Moved in my new dorm today. Place a bit bigger than my old room in Australia, but apparently I have to share it with another person. First year. Name of Nitori Aiichirou. He was already here when I got back with my stuff, and the first thing he said—after introducing himself—was, ‘Do you prefer top or bottom?’

What the fuck. I thought it was some sort of tradition, tbh. Do they do that sort of thing here in Samezuka? It’s an all-boys school, after all.

Although if I really had to do it (apparently not, since it turned out he was talking about the bunk bed), ~~I don’t think I kind of would mind doing it with Nitori~~ WTF

But he’s kind of super cute? And he was so nervous and earnest and just. UGH.

WTF am I doing thinking of my new roommate like that?

Well, it’s his fucking fault for being so fucking vague in the first place. Fucking Nitori Aiichirou with his stupid pudding bowl hair and his stupid mole. Stupid high-pitched voice, too. I’m looking forward to coming up with new ways to shut him up.

Make better use of that cute little mouth

FUCKING STOP IT RIN

Fuck. I need to take a shower.

Day 2, 3000 cal, 10 st 7 lb

Fucking kid talks in his sleep. Whimpers a bit, too. Wonder if he’d make the same noises when

Fucking one-track mind, Rin.

I’d better just sit here in bed and agonise over my lack of swimming talent. Yeah. All that angst over losing to Haru. I think I’m gonna cry. 

LATER

Apparently Nitori’s in the Samezuka swim club himself. Wonder what he looks like in Speedos?

Day 17, 3540 cal, 10 st 6 lb

So my win doesn’t really matter because Haru’s fucking out of shape. Probably all that mackerel. Makoto needs to work him up a bit. Maybe I better send him some tips for vigorous adventurous sex anonymously over mail.

Except what if his parents see?

Serves him right for spoiling Haru. They’re like an old married couple, it’s really quite sickening.

Nitori’s probably the sort of person who’d spoil his lover rotten, too. He has the same wifey sort of vibes as Makoto. Maybe he’d make bento with only an apron on. Bet he has the arse for it. Perky little Nitori arse.

He’s probably hiding moles under all those clothes, too.

Day 18, 2600 cal, 10 st 5 lb (why do I even bother what’s going on)

Makoto sent an email about his stinking little swim club. As if I care. I’m not joining the Samezuka swim club for a bunch of losers like them.

And I’m definitely not doing it in the off-chance of catching Nitori stark naked in the shower rooms, either.

I have a fucking dream, goddammit.

Day 22, 3500 cal, 10 st 7 lb

Gou came up with an idea to have the Iwatobi shitheads practice with the Samezuka swim club. WTF was she thinking? She better not have the hots for Mikoshiba I swear to god.

Funny kid who can’t even swim went with them. Poor kid. I can tell by the way Nagisa looks at him that he’s gonna have a hard time of it.

Operative word being hard.

Boomerang Megane better prepare his arse good. He’d never know what hit him.

LATER

Nitori was all over how good Haru was at swimming LIKE WTF. He already beat me years ago and took away all my dreams 

AND NOW he’s going to steal my cute piece of arse even though he already has Makoto.

LIKE back off BITCH.

Day 25, 2800 cal, 10 st 6 lb

Iwatobi shitheads training in the ocean today. Like WTF whose harebrained idea was it to bring Makoto to the ocean?

And why the fuck did Haru let it happen? He needs to take better care of his man, tbh.

I’m turning into the most worried aunt of all worried aunts. 

Maybe I should distract myself or something. 

Or maybe not. Nitori’s sleeping on the bed next to mine and we’ve been sleeping in the same room for weeks now except he’s sleeping on the bed next to mine.

Nope. Nothing new to see there. I’m out.

Day 34, 3200 cal, 10 st 7 lb

Told Nitori I won’t be going to the prefecturals on the bus with the rest of the swim club, and he was all, ‘Are you going to meet with Nanase-san?’

Oh, Nanase-san, was it? And why is he so interested in Nanase-san, anyway?

He was helping me with my sit-ups at the time, and god, he was so cute so fucking cute. I’ve no idea what he was talking about, really. Something to do with the 100 m free event or whatever.

He looked kinda upset, so I told him he had endurance, so 400 m freestyle would be perfect for him.

Doing it all night with me would be kinda perfect, too, little Energizer Nitori bunny.

By then I was getting pretty worked up—and he was sure to notice, since he was sitting there between my legs (FUCK) so I had to move away and talk about my father (I’m so sorry dad holy shit I’m so fucking sorry fuck) just to calm Little Rin down over there. 

Day 36, 3000 cal, 10 st 6 lb

BEAT HARU IN THE RACE!

And now Nitori’s all, ‘You can move on now!’

Yeah, so you can get your enduring little hands on Nanase-san, was it? Well, Makoto’s never gonna let you. And you’re gonna come back crying to me, just you wait and see.

Day 37, 3250 cal, 10 st 8 lb

Nitori dragged me back to the pool to see the Iwatobi shitheads swim the medley relay AND why the fuck did he know they were swimming the relay anyway? I swear to god, if he really has the hots for Haru I QUIT.

And what the fuck is going on with Boomerang Megane? Sure, Nagisa probably keeps him pretty busy, but that’s no excuse for swimming about like he’d been fucked hard in the arse all night long. What a fucking loser. 

Day 39, 2900 cal, 10 st 7 lb

Squid festival. Or was it the crab one? I get them confused a lot.

Anyway, this is the time in my life where I get really angsty and depressed. BUT Nitori’s paying more attention to me, so at least there’s that.

He mentioned regrets about not wearing a yukata, but I was totally against that shit because holy mother of squid, how am I supposed to behave myself with all of that easy access walking right next to me?

Had to leave him behind or I might’ve ended up doing all sorts of inappropriate things in public. Didn’t even see him eat caramel apples and getting gunk all over his face. I don’t think my brains could’ve handled all the tongue urges.

LATER

Just talked to Mikoshiba about swimming in the relay for Samezuka. Maybe get my mind off things a bit.

Day 43, 2900 cal, 10 st 7 lb

Boomerang Megane had the guts to come and talk to me, asking me shit about my motives and what I felt about Haru.

Like, why don’t you ask Nitori, since he’s all interested and shit.

I swim how I want, bitches.

Day 44, 3100 cal, 10 st 6 lb

Talked to Boomerang Megane about my feelings. I can’t fucking believe it. Guess it was kind of cathartic to finally admit how I feel about wanting to swim with my friends and wanting to fuck Nitori so much I don’t even. Rei was actually quite sympathetic. Guess it has to do with him having his own Energizer Nagisa bunny.

LATER

Mikoshiba just up and told me I couldn’t swim in the relay after all LIKE WTF. He’s doing this because I won’t let him date Gou, I swear to god.

Day 45, who gives a fuck

Made a complete tit of myself.

CAN I JUST FUCKING DIE NOW

LATER

Actually got to swim with the Iwatobi shitheads, thanks to Rei. It was kinda like the old times again. And fuck, I just missed those idiots, all right?

Also, I think I heard Nitori shout my name while I was swimming, and he probably wasn’t all that angry after I threw a tantrum all over the place and nearly hit him. JUST.

We actually won the relay! Although of course, since I was from a different school, they had to disqualify Iwatobi. But it’s still a good feeling, yeah?

Emotions kinda going up and down, tbh. I feel fucking great about making up with my old friends, but I’ve also been a complete arse to Nitori, and I have to make it up to him somehow just FUCK.

LATER STILL

Called him ‘Ai’ to his face and he ACTUALLY BLUSHED and he was really actually SO FUCKING CUTE and maybe I have it made after all. Like, ‘Let’s go practice again tomorrow, Ai’ and he fucking called me ‘Rin-senpai’ and just asjdffjdsgkdfhg

RIN IS THE KING YEAH.


End file.
